“The Time of Day Belongs to Everyone”

Dear Reader:

When I was looking for a little memento to give Brooke of our NYC Christmas adventure….I thought this Christmas Tree ornament, showing a NYC taxicab, about summed it all up. We watched Henry, Brooke’s son, dash through cars and heavy traffic to flag down a cab for us….holding our breath the whole time. It seems like life centers around finding a taxi when you need one… which for us, was the whole time we were there.

The other week I caught part of an interview on Deborah Roberts and her husband Al Roper’s newly published book (on marriage) called: Been There, Done That.

Deborah recalled that her mother’s favorite expression which she called out to her everyday when she left the house was:

“The time of day belongs to everyone.”

It wasn’t until she got older and left home that the significance and meaning of the phrase ‘hit home.” Her mother was telling her that she will find many moments in the upcoming day to make a difference in someone else’s life by simply being kind.

Deborah told the interviewer that she sometimes feels like she has lost some of her southern hospitality in living in NYC where everyone races and rushes, competing for time, space, and yes…taxis. And then one day she finally realized that she had the power to turn someone else’s attitude around as she repeated silently “The time of day belongs to everyone” and “Always give people more than they expect.”

Here is the excerpt from the book about this very incident:

DEBORAH

Several years ago, I was on assignment interviewing a man and his wife who were facing a tragic situation. After the interview, I went into their bathroom to wash my hands and noticed a sign they had hanging up on the wall that was headlined “Rules of Life.”

There were a number of great phrases written on the plaque about finding peace and being positive, but the one that stuck with me that day was, “Always give people more than they expect.” That resonated with me because it reminded me so much of my mother. She is the first person who taught me to think above and beyond when you are doing something with or for someone else.

Last winter was an especially harsh one for many parts of the country. We had more snow and bitterly cold days than I can ever remember in all of the years I’ve lived in New York City. On a particularly miserable day in December, in the thick of the Christmas season, I was rushing home after work and was lucky to find a cab right away.

It was one of those blessed New York moments when a cab stops on the corner where you’re standing. I made a dash for it at the same time another woman had spotted it. I didn’t see her, nor do I believe she saw me. I jumped in on one side as she made her move on the other. She had a dispirited look on her face when she realized I wasn’t about to let the coveted cab go.

Now, ordinarily, the New Yorker in me would have said, “Sorry, lady!” But something inside told me to ask where she was headed. She looked exasperated, as if she had been standing in the cold, wet snow for quite some time. I told her I was headed to Eighty-second and Second Avenue. She said she was going to Seventy-fifth and First.

“Maybe you two can share!” the cabdriver suggested.

“Sure,” I said. “I don’t mind at all! Hop on in.”

The woman jumped in and noticed I had Pepper, our family dog, with me. She rolled her eyes, resentful of her presence and of mine, clearly asking herself why she was getting into this cab with either of us. She just looked disdainful of everything.

I could have taken an attitude back with her.

But I didn’t.

Instead, I used our short ride together to try to turn her day around.

“How are you doing today?” I asked.

“Don’t even ask!” she said.

“Where are we headed to first, ladies?” the driver chimed in.

“I’d be happy to drop you at Seventy-fifth and Third— it’s right on the way,” I politely offered.

“Ugh. I can’t walk that far. I’ve been on my feet all day. I am exhausted.”

Before she could go any further, I realized this woman needed a break much more than I did. “You know what? You can drop me at Seventy-fourth and Second and I’ll walk the rest of the way so you can take this lovely woman right to her front door.”

She didn’t know what to say.

But I knew that in that moment she needed more than she was expecting.

With that simple gesture, she began to crack that tough facade and warmed up to me. She told me she was seventy-eight years old and was still working in the jewelry district five days a week. Her office was near Rockefeller Center, near the Christmas tree, so the traffic and the hordes of people every day had become overwhelming.

I told her I understood how hard this time of year can be and reminded her that this too shall pass. The holidays are tough for a lot of people, but they come and go and things will get better. By the time we got to my stop, she had forgotten all about her terrible day. She started to dig in her purse to pay for the cab, but before she could find her wallet, I handed her more than enough to cover the ride.

“Here, take this.”

“I don’t have any change,” she said.

“Go home and have a hot cup of tea, put your feet up and relax,” I said, offering her a smile and a wink before I got out of the cab. “God bless you!” she called out.

I turned to her before closing the door and said, “Next time you’ll give me the ride, okay?” And with that I offered her a quick wave and then Pepper and I were on our way. I had a little extra pep in my step as I walked home that afternoon. I felt good being able to do something kind for a stranger, and I felt more gratitude about life.

…………………….

So until tomorrow let’s remember, to not only appreciate life’s extras, but to give extra attention to those who need it.

“Today is my favorite day” Winnie the Pooh

Yesterday was so pretty I toured the Flowertown Nursery off Highway 78. They have completely re-done the whole complex….I found so many words of wisdom and dream items for my garden that I stayed in a state of bliss the whole time. Let me share some ‘imaginings’ with you. (The first photo- the two-seated trellis is the big treasure in my garden dreams….maybe if I start saving now….?)